Jewish Alternative in Love, Dating and Marriage by Pinchas Stolper
98% of the first book of Genesis, is devoted to narratives describing the creation of the world, the beginnings of mankind, and mankind, and Abraham, Isaac. Jacob and the Tribes of Israel. The reason Genesis dwells on biography, personalities, events and not laws is to instruct us to pattern our own lives on their struggles, their challenges and solutions which they employed.
Of course, were the Bible to have recorded the full biographies of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and their children, many volumes would have been required. Instead, the Bible selects very few incidents, because these specific events represent the special life situations which the Bible expects us to emulate.
Let’s study a few examples relating to the “place” of women: When the Jewish people are enslaved and oppressed in Egypt. The Talmud tells us that Amram, father of Moses, was the leader of that generation. When the Egyptians said that all male children be drowned, Amram decided that he could no longer bring children into the world.
Therefore, he separated from his wife and all the Jewish men followed his lead. At that point his daughter, Miriam, demanded “Father your decree is more cruel than Pharaoh’s. Pharaoh’s decree applies to male children alone, But yours applies to all children equally. Pharaoh’s decree may or may not persist but because you are a righteous man your decree will persist,” Miriam’s insight convinced her father, he takes back his wife, and so do the others. As a result Moses is born and thus begins the chain of events which result in the liberation and birn of the Jewish people.
In the desert, the Jews worship a golden calf. The Talmud relates that only men were involved in this crime while the women refused to participate. When Aaron the High Priest solicited gold to construct the golden calf, the Torah informs us that the wives refused to part with their jewelry. The women, however, didn’t simply refused to surrender their jewelry because the love of jewelry – because later on when the time came to build the Holy Tabernacle, we are told that the women were very generous in their contributions of gold.
Later on, while the Jewish people still wandering in the desert, they decided to send spies to the Land of Israel prior to attempting to invade it. Ten spies returned with a frightening and negative report. “There is no way we can conquer the land.”, they reported. “Giants live there- the cities were walled to the heavens- their armies are much to powerful.” As a result the Jews rebelled: “Why did you bring us out of Egypt to be slaughtered by our enemies?” they cried. As punishment, the Jews were forced to remain in the Sinai desert for an additional 38 years. Rashi, the famous Bibical commentator, teaches that only men rebelled – women were prepared for whatever sacrifices were required in order to conquer the Land of Israel. Since the men rebelled, only they died in the desert while the women merited to enter the Land of Israel.
- Marriage (The Legal Framework)From the Jewish Marriage Page 23 – 24 Love and commitment are not enough to get married, and for more than one reason. There is no guarantee that today’s love will not go sour. Nor is there a necessary connection between love and capacity to protect one’s future partner from the contingencies noun (plural) a […]
- Shalom BayitFrom the Jewish Marriage page 41 – 44 Shalom, as the word which is used to describe “peace”, relates in a fundamental sense to the word shlemut, or “completeness.” Shalom disconnected from shlemut peace disconnected from “completeness” is a peace which manifest itself as mutual nonaggression, peace as the absence of war. Shalom with shlemut […]
- Husband & Wife (General Rights & Duties)From the Encyclopaedia Judaica 8:1120 A husband has ten obligations toward his wife (or her descendants) and four rights in respect of her, The obligations are: To provide her with sustenance or maintenance. To Supply her with clothing and lodging To cohabit with her To provide the Kethbbah (i.e. the sum fixed for the wife […]
- Husband & Wife (the main Ketubbah)Medical Care Ransom from captivity
- Birth ControlFrom Jewish Marriage pages 21-22 The woman’s position regarding birth control emanates directly from extreme sensitivity of the Torah The first five books of the Bible or also called “the books of Moses” Torah sometimes interpreted “THE LAW” would be better interpreted the teachings. Torah comes from an archery term meaning to shoot. to her […]
- Niddah“Menstrous Woman” According to Jewish law, a woman is forbidden to maintain sexual relations with her husband during and for sometimes both before and after her menses.
- Womens “Place”Jewish Alternative in Love, Dating and Marriage by Pinchas Stolper Page 77-78 98% of the first book of Genesis, is devoted to narratives describing the creation of the world, the beginnings of mankind, and mankind, and Abraham, Isaac. Jacob and the Tribes of Israel. The reason Genesis dwells on biography, personalities, events and not laws […]
- Marriage (Hasdic View)The Hasdic Anthology page 24 Rabbi Isaiah Kalman Halberstadt said: “We read in the Talmud (Taanith 30b): Said Rabban Simeon ben Gamaliel: ‘There were no holidays in Israel Like Yom Kippur and the Fifteenth of Ab.’ On the latter day (Midsummer Day) the maidens were privileged to ask young men in marriage. They would arrange […]
- The WeddingA wedding celebration is considered a sacred time in Jewish culture, enriched with deep tradition and meaning. During the Torah reading, the groom is respectfully called up to the Bimah, surrounded by the wholehearted love and support of his community. This time-honored ceremony links us to our history and showcases our bright future brimming with […]
- Husband & Wife (Cohabitation)From the Encyclopaedia Judaica 8:1122 The Husband’s duty to cohabit with his wife stems from biblical law (Exodus 21:10) and he is obliged to do so according to his physical abilities and so far as it is possible for him having regard to the requirements of his occupation (Yad, Ishut 14: 1,2 ; Sh. Ar., […]
- Husband (The Legal Obligations)Jewish Marriage (A Halakhic Ethic) The Husband has ten essential obligations. Briefly, they are as follows: to sustain his wife to provide adequate clothing to provide conjugal visitation to fulfill the essential ketuvah obligations to pay her medical bills to redeem her if she is kidnapped upon her death, to ensure her proper burial, assuming […]
- The Tradition Of MarriageThe first of the 613 mitzvoth (commandments) in the Torah is“peru ur-vu” (Be Fruitful and multiply). Judaism sanctifies every dimension of human experience from birth to death, from eating eliminating. Sexuality and procreation are sanctified by marriage, the primary purpose of which is the creation of life. Every wedding sets the stage for the next […]
- BetrothalFrom When a Jew Celebrates In the Bible and the Talmud there were two separate ceremonies Connected with marriage. There was the ceremony of betrothal and the actual marriage. The two ceremonies could be a year apart. In Betrothal the couple were legally bound together although the bride lived in her father’s house. They couldn’t […]
- Husband & WifeThe act of marriage creates certain rights and duties between husband and wife. In performing them both parties have to conduct themselves according to the following rules, comprising the fundamental principles for the relationship between husband and wife in Jewish Law :” This the sages laid down that a man shall honor his wife more […]
- Marriage (the concept)In Jewish teaching, marriage , is the ideal human state and is considered a basic social institution established by God at the time of creation. In the Bible. The purposes of marriage and procreation: “It is not good that the man should be alone ; I will make him a help meet for him… Therefore […]